Times have certainly changed. Especially in recent decades,
the concept of family is very different from what our parents had, not to
mention our grandparents and great-grandparents!
Now, regardless of this fact, the family has always been a fundamental nucleus in the development of each one of us. We must bear in mind that, from the moment we are born, our family is located in our closest environment. They are the closest people with whom we deal, with whom we are in contact the longest and the ones who should convey the most trust to us.
On many occasions, this does not happen, creating problems that not only influence said family environment, but also our own individual development. In this case, family counselling can be an extremely important psychological resource. Precisely, in this article we are going to talk about what family counselling consists of and how it works.
What is the family?
Before investigating family counselling, we must answer another much more important question: what is the family? Traditionally, we understand that the family is made up of a father, a mother and the children.
However, the concept of family, and more in these times, does not focus so much on the blood line " per se ". Thus, we could say that the family is made up of a group of people who live together and have a life project in common.
Therefore, it is not necessarily the relationship between parents and children but, as a result of coexistence and living under the same roof, a series of relationships related to intimacy, dependence and reciprocity are established. That is to say, of a set of feelings that notably affect our personal space.
Problems that may run in the family and may require therapy
This close relationship makes, on many occasions, conflicts difficult to resolve. This problem is exacerbated precisely by the closeness to the person or persons with whom we have said conflict.
Thus, facing it with total freedom and without hurting the feelings of other people, make it necessary to address this situation with a clear decision to improve said relationship, where family counselling can be an indispensable resource.
Throughout a long relationship, many problems can appear. Some of those that most often affect the family are the following:
1. The communication
One of the problems that arise, whether in a couple or in the family, is related to the lack of communication between the different parties. Despite the coexistence, many times one of the members feels distressed and does not have the confidence to explain their feelings.
2. Change in the family bosom
Individually, it can be very difficult to adapt to different changes. From moving to another city, losing your job or developing a chronic illness, for example. These types of changes can also significantly affect family life. In other cases, the change may be direct in the family structure itself, such as divorce or the death of one of them.
3. Family decision making and rule management
In many cases, the problem arises from decisions, whether they are routine or of great importance. The conflict arises from the imposition of certain rules or decisions on the rest of the family members, but also due to permissiveness and excess of freedom.
4. Inappropriate and aggressive behaviors
Another of the issues that most often affect the members of a family has to do with the behavior of one of its members. Whether due to problems related to aggressiveness, which generates fights and even verbal or physical violence, or inappropriate behaviors, such as alcoholism, it is clear that it weakens the good relationship between members of the family nucleus.
What is family counselling?
Family counselling is specially designed to solve this type of conflict and promote a better coexistence among family members. Fundamentally, it focuses on achieving better communication between members so that respect and understanding are restored towards the rest of the individuals in the family nucleus.
Basically, family counselling focuses on improving the functioning of the family, in addition to improving the relationship between the members of the family.
How does family counselling work?
This all sounds perfect, doesn't it? The questions that follow, as is normal, are some like these: how is it achieved? How does family counselling work? Do not worry! Now, I explain how family counselling works and why it can be of great help to you.
The figure of the psychologist in family therapies often works as if it were a moderator, even if it is not only to give a voice to each of the family members.
At first, the psychologist is in charge of studying the family, either as a whole or individually. For this, the best thing is that the therapy is carried out with all the members.
The objective is to take a “photograph” of the family through different questions and conversations. These are questions with which to find out the problems of the family, both individual and group, as well as the relationship between each of the members.
Once said photograph is obtained, it is up to the family to proceed or not with the treatment and with the proposal made by the psychologist. Here, the therapist will have drawn up a plan, detecting the problems of each person and their relationship.
The therapy continues with different sessions to resolve these conflicts. Many times, it is thought that these sessions always have to be with the family, but nothing could be further from the truth.
These types of sessions can also be carried out individually, in order to find the necessary mechanisms to improve communication and the expression of the feelings of each one, for example, or to focus on the person who has the problem that affects the patient. rest of the family and its relationship with the rest of its members.
As you can imagine, over time is how the rough edges within the family are smoothed out. In this case, therapy consists of placing the needs of each member at the same level, so that jointly a positive dynamic is achieved.
For this to happen, there has to be a complete will for the members of the family. If so, don't hesitate to ask Dr. Jonathan Toussaint!
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